Thursday, March 01, 2012

Why Panic??

White Rabbit, Happy St.David's day and welcome to March......

I'm fine, I'm happy and my blog posting have proven that, no dark matters, nothing to concern yourselves with and yet,                      and yet I revert back to a mild state of paranoia.   I say mild as it is indeed mild compared to some of the times I've tried winding myself up about.  This time I sent a text to my best friend having not heard from her for a while.  I couldn't think of anything I'd said wrong, or done or hadn't done.  I have been convincing myself that everything was OK< that I had to cause for alarm, and yet I still had to send a text saying sorry for what ever.  

Now is that insecurity in me?  Why would I be insecure in the strongest friendship I've ever had?  Is it me being scared of losing that?  However, I'd have heard something before now about this had I done something wrong.  Still I panic, still I can't stop trying to figure out why, even though I'm telling myself not to worry, that  the reasons given are exactly the reasons that had prevented me from doing just this previously.  So why today??

To be honest I don't know, and that's the strangest thing about it, I did what I normally end up doing and will continue to do so from time to time.  It's something that I've got to unlearn to do. 

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